Posts Tagged ‘relationships’
My Apology Is Not Accepted: Now what?
How do I feel when my apology isn’t accepted? Years ago, in a conversation with a good friend, I inadvertently said something that obviously upset them and the conversation ended abruptly. Mystified, I phoned back on several occasions and started to apologise, however, it was obvious that talking on the phone wasn’t an option. Upset,…
Read MoreWhen they won’t talk…
They won’t talk. We keep going in circles…I can’t do anything. As a mediator, I’m often asked ” But what can I do if they won’t talk to me? ” They feel stuck because the other people involved don’t want to talk. It’s frustrating and aggravating. And if you really believe that you can’t do anything,…
Read MoreRestore Relationships: Conflict First Aid 3
When things go wrong and people get hurt, medical first aid is essential. The same is true for conflict first aid. The aims of medical first aid are to preserve life, prevent harm and promote recovery. The aims of conflict first aid are to protect what is important, prevent harm and restore relationships.In my last…
Read MoreOver-committed and struggling with self-compassion? 3 different solutions
I thought this would be a quiet week. I would get caught up with reading and have time to spend sorting out my new website. Then, a flurry of requests from friends, relatives, colleagues, and students. I felt unappreciated and overcommitted,unable to have self-compassion. This is a common issue, particularly for people with elderly relatives,…
Read MoreWhy is asking for help so hard? Tips to do it well.
I have a confession to make. I like many others am a help addict. We get a buzz out of helping others, and sometimes forget to let others have the chance to get that buzz. We hate asking for help but love giving. What do I mean? At a networking event, the delicious array on the…
Read MoreBroken promises? How to move on
Broken promises break friendships, destroy marriages and undermine businesses. Yet every day, we hear I know I promised, but… I’m sorry I can’t do what I promised… The more you trust someone, the more their broken promise hurts. There is anger at the promise-breaker, and shame that we trusted them. We lash out, crawl away…
Read MoreDealing with Difficult People: Banishing the Gloom
Dealing with difficult people: Banishing the gloom Dealing with difficult people can drain your energy and positivity so it seems life is full of black clouds and gloom. It can be like a visit from the dementors so feared in the Harry Potter stories. How can you keep yourself positive, kind and cheerful when dealing with…
Read MoreHealing Wounded Relationships: How to Start
Healing Wounded Relationships Now Brexit and the US election are over, we need to work on healing wounded relationships. Whoever has won, the world goes on and the losers, winners, and bystanders have to find a way to move on. When there has been a great deal of anger and bitterness and when hate has…
Read MoreGiving Bad News in a Good Way
We all like to be liked and thought of as kind people, so resist giving bad news or negative feedback. We tend to put it off, sugar coat it or do the infamous “feedback sandwich.” (Adam Grant on why the feedback sandwich doesn’t work) Most of these tactics actually make it worse. So we avoid talking…
Read MoreWalking on Eggshells?
Some of us spend our lives worrying about what others think, some of us couldn’t care. Most of us are somewhere in the middle. We care about what the important people in our lives think about us. Sometimes, suddenly, whatever we say seems to be the wrong thing. We feel like we are walking on eggshells, frightened of breaking our…
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