Conversations not Confrontations

Conversations not confrontations

I designed the Conversations not Confrontations course ┬áin response to a request from an organisation after a successful mediation. The employees involved found the way the organisation had managed their differences before actually exacerbated the issues. They asked me to tell management that the “conversations not confrontations” approach of mediation was much better. I talked…

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Consider Mediation before Grievance/Disciplinary

Why should charities or other caring organisations consider conflict first aid or mediation before grievance or disciplinary procedures? A grievance procedure may actually intensify conflict and divisions, especially if it is lengthy, complex or inconclusive. Disciplinary procedures create defensiveness, and even end up in the party starting a grievance procedure. In small organisations, it is…

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How To Reduce Misunderstanding

Reduce misunderstanding–is that possible? Most of the conflicts I deal with as a mediator start with a misunderstanding. Even small misunderstandings potentially lead to damaged relationships or breakdowns of communication. Why do misunderstandings occur Our brains are continually trying to find patterns in the world and other people. If we spot a pattern, it makes…

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4 Steps to Say No Nicely

say no

When we say no nicely it actually stops destructive conflict. Yet so often we say yes when we know that no is the right answer. Why we say yes when we should say no Sometimes we don’t say no because we fear upsetting others. We say yes without thinking it through. We get in the…

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Conflict Coaching

Conflict coaching

Conflict coaching helps you to be your best self in conflict and stressful situations. Most people react to stress instinctively or in ingrained patterns learned from their childhood. Are you happy with the way you respond to conflict? Does it give you the results you want? Sometimes, learned responses work in one situation but not…

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Changing People Who Don’t Want to Change

don't want change

Changing people who don’t want to change? Is it even possible? Here are some options if you are stuck in a situation where changing people is hard. I want to sort this out, but (insert name here) just doesn’t want to do anything. It would be great if we could just discuss the situation, but…

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