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When You Don’t have Control

When we don’t have control, most of us feel unsettled, angry and strive to get control. Whether it is a naughty child, an illness, financial problems or relationship issues, we all strive to be in control, to fix the situation. Yet our striving for control and solutions can make the situation worse instead of better.…

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Unfairness: What to Do?

unfairness sometimes works in our favour

Unfairness creates negative emotions and is a common cause of unhappiness and conflict. Think about how you feel when someone queue jumps or takes a double helping of your favourite food and leaves none for you or someone gets the job you feel you deserve. Reactions to Unfairness “Hard-wired” in the Brain Researcher Renee Baillargeon…

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Caring for Elderly Parents: A Source of Conflict?

Caring for elderly parents may bring a family together or tear them apart. As life expectancy grows, people in their 60s and 70s are still caring for parents, despite their own declining health.  People work for much longer now, often providing childcare for their grandchildren. Tiredness, ill health and family arguments add to the stress.…

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The joys of being live online…and benefits for business

nancy virtual coffee

The joys of live online interaction are so great, that I’d like to share them with you. Tomorrow, I will enjoy a cup of coffee with a friend–who lives thousands of miles away. It’s not as good as being there in real life. (For a start, she makes great coffee and usually has some home-baked…

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Manage annoyances well & avoid major problems

manage annoyances well

I’ve written before about how random acts of kindness can make a huge difference to others and boost your own happiness. In this blog, I’ll write about how little things can cause big problems. Like a dropped match that lights a wildfire, small irritations, if not addressed, can flare into major confrontations. Manage annoyances well…

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Leaving the past behind and moving on

get back up

How much of today do we waste regretting yesterday? What is stopping us from leaving the past behind and moving on?  Why do we nurse our grudges and hang on to old injuries? Or are we not even aware that we are doing it? Here is a quiz to help you figure out where you…

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Magic Potion to Banish the Blues

It was a dreary day and had started badly. One of my colleagues at work seemed to find fault with everything I did. Then we ran out of milk. I wished I had a reset button for the day or a magic potion to banish the blues.  But there was a lot to do and…

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Making Difficult Conversations Easier

Making Difficult Conversations Easier Most people would prefer me to write about getting rid of the need for awkward discussions, rather than about making difficult conversations easier.  This is no more possible than waving a magic wand and get rid of all the ice and snow in winter. However, just as we can lessen the…

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Personality Clash: Sandpaper People

Sandpaper People

Have you ever had a personality clash with someone? When just the sight of them starts you prickling? What can you do if it is someone you have to interact with? This might be at work, or socially because they are relatives or friends. A personality clash can really disrupt your life and impact on…

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How to manage difficult people

difficult people the grinch

I’m often asked how to manage difficult people, especially at this time of year, when we feel obliged to interact with people we normally avoid. If only life was like the story of the  Grinch who stole Christmas. via GIPHY With a bit of magic and a different viewpoint, horrible people could be transformed into lovely…

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