Manage annoyances well & avoid major problems

manage annoyances well

I’ve written before about how random acts of kindness can make a huge difference to others and boost your own happiness. In this blog, I’ll write about how little things can cause big problems. Like a dropped match that lights a wildfire, small irritations, if not addressed, can flare into major confrontations. Manage annoyances well…

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Personality Clash: Sandpaper People

Sandpaper People

Have you ever had a personality clash with someone? When just the sight of them starts you prickling? What can you do if it is someone you have to interact with? This might be at work, or socially because they are relatives or friends. A personality clash can really disrupt your life and impact on…

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Guest Post: Fighting with Your Partner? Better Sleep Can Help

In my blog about boosting resilience, I mentioned sleep as a key factor. Here is a guest post from sleep expert Sarah Johnson of Tuck about how sleep helps reduce conflict. Relationships are full of ups and downs. Arguments are a normal and healthy part of life. However, if fighting has become the most common form…

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Why can’t they see the truth?

same truth, different angles

When we argue, our truth seems so obvious. We ask ourselves “Why can’t they see the truth?” Or we accuse them of lying. This makes us even more determined to prove that we are right. We appeal to friends, colleagues, strangers to agree with us and help us prove the other person wrong. Research and…

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When they won’t talk…

They won’t talk. We keep going in circles…I can’t do anything.  As a mediator, I’m often asked ” But what can I do if they won’t talk to me? ” They feel stuck because the other people involved don’t want to talk. It’s frustrating and aggravating. And if you really believe that you can’t do anything,…

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Restore Relationships: Conflict First Aid 3

Damaging or restoring relationships

When things go wrong and people get hurt, medical first aid is essential. The same is true for conflict first aid. The aims of medical first aid are to preserve life, prevent harm and promote recovery. The aims of conflict first aid are to protect what is important, prevent harm and restore relationships.In my last…

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Prevent Harm: Conflict First Aid 2

prevent harm conflict resolution

The aim of conflict first aid is to protect what is important, prevent harm and promote restoration of relationships.  As in medical first aid, there are simple steps that anyone can do to make sure the situation doesn’t deteriorate. My last blog gave 3 tips on how to protect what is important.  Those of you who…

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Broken promises? How to move on

Trust, broken promise

Broken promises break friendships, destroy marriages and undermine businesses. Yet every day, we hear I know I promised, but… I’m sorry I can’t do what I promised… The more you trust someone, the more their broken promise hurts. There is anger at the promise-breaker, and shame that we trusted them. We lash out, crawl away…

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Why being reasonable doesn’t always work

rational, reasonable

We think if people were just reasonable, we would be able to persuade them. If you are starting a conversation to change someone’s mind with the words “If only you would be reasonable…” or “It’s just common sense…” I’ve got bad news for you…it won’t work. Because what the other person hears is “You are…

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First Aid for Personality Clashes

Wouldn’t it be great if when there was a personality clash, we could just reach for the first aid box? Or if people were all as sensible as us? Most of us have worked with someone that we just didn’t get on with. Some of us remember dreading going to work because of a colleague…

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